Saturday, April 11, 2009

Pirates


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America's Commander in Chief is bravely tackling the capture of US vessels by "keeping apprised of the situation" . Which is helpful because...uh...well...um....

UPDATE 4/12/09 - Captain Richard Phillips was safely rescued by Navy Seals, after President Obama gave the go-ahead to use military force. This was the right thing to do, and we commend the President for taking this initiative. Policy-wise, this really IS "change we can believe in."

Friday, April 10, 2009

Surprise Trip


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Coincidentally, it was the only stop on the President's overseas trip that he didn't tell the crowd how annoying America is!

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Bow to the King


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The Whitehouse now denies that Obama bowed down to the Saudi king, despite video and photos to the contrary. They say that "The President is taller than the king, so he had to bend to shake hands." Here's a hint, Mr. President - when they're looking down on the back of your head, you're bending over too far. And too willingly.


Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Math Skills


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Do you ever wonder if Tim Geithner is seizing banks, grabbing private industries, and threatening CEOs because a bully once stole his lunch money?

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Laundry Tip


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Broken campaign promises? Corrupt friends and business partners? Blatant anti-capitalist policies? No problem - it all comes out in the wash! (And it's phosphate-free!)

Monday, April 6, 2009

Korean Missile


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Now that North Korea has called President Obama's bluff, how long will it be till they use their missiles to come for our pie?

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Gay Marriage


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Actually, it's not the idea of gay marriage that is so startling - but Iowa?!